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View an Archived Rant - Tailgate Rescue Crew - Rescuing Tailgaters from the Mundane!

It's rarely good to be late. Like a...

brought forth this day: 2015-09-26 23:05:02
missed period by your high school girlfriend, it only creates anxiety and a bunch of frantic calls asking, "did you get it, yet?"
Apparently the same is true with the Rant. Not getting it drives some of you to txt and email - "no rant? WTF" or "quit slacking and send the rant", or my favorite "Douche. Rant?"
Well, here's your stomach cramping, headache causing, acne outbreak making, over the pants only heavy petting rant for the week.
But like a good period, I'll be brief and and you'll still have the opportunity to hookup at some point during the weekend.

Saints! No Brees. Cooler weather. Gumbo-Laya. Potential 3-0 start (last time was 2003-remember what happened then)
I've talked smack about New Orleans a shit ton thru the years. Nothing else to say. Food is great. Its a party that won't quit and it smells like gym taint. New Orleans is basically the sink strainer in a college bathroom sink. Full of vomit, cheap booze and lost dignity. And if this is the end of the "Breesus Era"...they'll once again bag their heads in shame like a Hogie Fulghum prom date.
We've had enough of your shitty english, Saints. Who-dat. Who-dat. Who dat is that would use such grammar? That's the real question.
So, bring an appetite. Bring your yelling voice and bring a bar of soap and a thesaurus for those dirty Cajuns.
Now....that wasn't too bad, was it? Periods over. You can remove that panty liner and get to partying. High School Matt Waters said he never cared anyway. His favorite movie was blood sport.
(too much?)
 See you Sunday.